Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
tell me about the eggs
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