GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Randomize
