I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly