I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
