Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
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