Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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