Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
