I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
