I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
