I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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