As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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