Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?

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(616): dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us? http://tfl.nu/bgpp

Replies (8) Good night (1225) Bad night (420)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.

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(978): I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it. http://tfl.nu/p2ch

Replies (4) Good night (2596) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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(231): View more from Michigan

i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.

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(231): i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am. http://tfl.nu/2854

Replies (26) Good night (470) Bad night (2522) Order T-Shirt
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(530): View more from California

I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.

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(530): I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store. http://tfl.nu/ogm6

Replies (18) Good night (1204) Bad night (3955) Order T-Shirt
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.

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(402): I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire. http://tfl.nu/9p46

Replies (12) Good night (4969) Bad night (990) Order T-Shirt
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(650): View more from California

Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished

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(650): Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished http://tfl.nu/z9y5

Replies (2) Good night (1736) Bad night (613) Order T-Shirt
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.

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(780): I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night. http://tfl.nu/oi63

Replies (6) Good night (2557) Bad night (606) Order T-Shirt
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(563): View more from Iowa

WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.

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(563): WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE. http://tfl.nu/f0cz

Replies (9) Good night (1229) Bad night (792) Order T-Shirt
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(408): View more from California

Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.

(831): View more from California

You did a keg stand on the toilet?!

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(408): Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying. (831): You did a keg stand on the toilet?! http://tfl.nu/1e43

Replies (6) Good night (680) Bad night (1232)
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(408): View more from California

Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.

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(408): Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding. http://tfl.nu/vpqq

Replies (5) Good night (496) Bad night (1060) Order T-Shirt
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(307): View more from Wyoming

Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.

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(307): Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too. http://tfl.nu/aq9s

Replies (4) Good night (1002) Bad night (264) Order T-Shirt
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.

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(603): Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon. http://tfl.nu/3aco

Replies (3) Good night (377) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt
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(519): View more from Ontario

People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.

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(519): People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style. http://tfl.nu/g3nw

Replies (3) Good night (986) Bad night (208) Order T-Shirt
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(289): View more from Ontario

For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)

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(289): For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013) http://tfl.nu/5uly

Replies (4) Good night (640) Bad night (401) Order T-Shirt
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week

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(267): I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week http://tfl.nu/wcg4

Replies (1) Good night (155) Bad night (485) Order T-Shirt

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