I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him