you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
even my farts smell like vagina
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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