Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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