No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
