That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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