we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Everything about him screamed your future.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I just sucked dick on a ferry
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
