Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
