its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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