Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize