So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
