This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
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