Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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