Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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