remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
