You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
