I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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