We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
