I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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