i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.