Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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