Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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