Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats. http://tfl.nu/m7i1
  Replies (1) Good night (1598) Bad night (493) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Can Purell be used as lube?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Can Purell be used as lube? http://tfl.nu/e9pj
  Replies (37) Good night (541) Bad night (3918) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  You know how I know you're gay?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments (320): You know how I know you're gay? http://tfl.nu/13va
  Replies (36) Good night (6663) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo. http://tfl.nu/heh2
  Replies (22) Good night (6902) Bad night (1253) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick. http://tfl.nu/ib3l
  Replies (23) Good night (1051) Bad night (7723) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost http://tfl.nu/fd0l
  Replies (5) Good night (3638) Bad night (826) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know http://tfl.nu/bbwr
  Replies (14) Good night (1464) Bad night (2890) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...

  (1-817): View more from Texas

  Actually, she's fat now, so...

  (817): View more from Texas

  Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but... (1-817): Actually, she's fat now, so... (817): Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson. http://tfl.nu/7993
  Replies (27) Good night (1718) Bad night (4881)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her. http://tfl.nu/f7hh
  Replies (19) Good night (1324) Bad night (3518) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american. http://tfl.nu/kvmq
  Replies (11) Good night (1745) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles. http://tfl.nu/yuyj
  Replies (10) Good night (1727) Bad night (379) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything

  (1-814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything (1-814): Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order http://tfl.nu/zkyg
  Replies (0) Good night (1114) Bad night (344) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams http://tfl.nu/mq8g
  Replies (8) Good night (769) Bad night (423) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness http://tfl.nu/eryk
  Replies (0) Good night (611) Bad night (274) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me. http://tfl.nu/rcmo
  Replies (5) Good night (243) Bad night (897) Order T-Shirt

Randomize