Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
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Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
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Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.