If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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