Nicole vs. Life
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
