dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize