Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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