stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
