I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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