There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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