It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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