I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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