She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
