I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
