Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
When did angry sex become our thing?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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