I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
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I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
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