There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
