Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Sorry about my life...
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
