Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
