Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
We need to get me chipped asap
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
