i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
